In Memory of our First Baby

I realize that many people, even those who have suffered miscarriage, will not understand the grief we're feeling right now. Before our baby died, we saw our child on two separate occasions with sonograms. Our baby already had fingers and toes and a unique nose. Our child was already a boy or a girl. He or she looked like John and me - probably more like one or the other of us. We heard our baby's good, strong heartbeat.

I know the pain and grief is multiplied many, many times for those parents who lose children that they've known for longer, kids that they've actually gotten to touch and hold. Yet, our grief is still naturally very deep and real.

So, we are honoring the memory of our baby with a donation to Compassion International's Child Survival Program. We have great medical care, the stability of jobs and financial support, and a strong, loving marriage. Our baby still died, and no one could have done anything differently. There are, however, millions of moms whose babies and young children die from things that can be easily prevented. That's where Compassion's Child Survival Program steps in.

So many moms around the world find themselves suddenly without their partner, far from adequate medical care, and lacking the knowledge to take good care of themselves and their babies. The Child Survival Program provides moms with prenatal care, health care, parenting skills training and spiritual nurturing, while giving the youngest children, including those yet to be born, the supplements, care, and opportunities needed to become healthy, thriving girls and boys.

We hope our gift will prevent some other moms from having to unnecessarily feel the grief we are going through right now. We always want some good to come from each situation in our life, and we believe it is important to do something in memory of those we lose. It is just one step in easing the pain of grief, ever so slightly.